This is me, finally letting go of my past, letting go of the memories of what I had, letting go of the first time I fell in love. God I know anyone reading this feels like this is a broken record, I've come to realize that there is never going to be another time for us, there doesn't seem to be anything for us again, maybe not even friendship, probably because I'm too scared to reach out to talk because I put my foot in my mouth.
Its the best though, its been so long now,but its just NOW that I finally fully realize that I have to let go of that dream of something with her again some day of that family that I dreamed of.It was just that a dream, I have someone new, and I might not be in love again yet, but she deserves better than me browsing my ex's blog and reading her entries.It wasn't her catching me on her blog that pissed her off, it was the fact I told her it was my ex's blog, and that I would go and check every few weeks.
She knew it wasn't right, and deep down I did too.This is going to sound like a broken record again here too;
I'm sorry for being difficult and a jerk and asshole after we broke up, posting what we did together was inexcusable and you have every right to keep not speaking to me ever again.
Babe, I'm sorry I haven't been where I should be mentally,it took me a lot to realize that but I'm glad you were that kick in the ass that did so, I'm enjoying our time more and more now.
Phew.
I guess that closes the chapter to one part of my life for good, its hard, like seriously it was I didn't think it ever would be I mean I never thought I'd be phased by well, love.Heh go figure.
